One Month In

It's been a hectic month.  With work and adjusting to a fuller house, I'm more than a little exhausted.  Though there have been some fantastic surprises so far.  First, I kept hearing about how Noah would 'regress' after his brother came along... that he would be more needy and act more like a 'baby' in order to stake out his claim as master of the house.  That hasn't happened at all.  In fact, Noah seems like something of an old sage compared to just a few weeks ago.  He's potty-trained, he's helping take care of Evan- even feeding him, helping with diaper changes, tapping Evan's back to help burp him....
That said, Noah isn't 100% satisfied with the new living arrangements.

Sometimes I'm not sure if his willingness to 'help out' with Even is an act of kindness or a ploy to make sure nothing interesting is going on behind his back.  These days he even falls asleep monitoring us to make sure we're not giving Evan any attention he isn't aware of.



Noah and I spend at least 15 - 30 minutes dancing every day.  It's kind of pissing me off that every time I play the drums he runs downstairs screaming "no drums, no drums", then authoritatively takes the sticks out of my hands, puts them away, drags me to the stereo and orders me to put in a CD.  Favorites for this week have been Gorillaz- 19/2000, Muse- Knights of Cydonia ("the horsey song"), and Beck- E Pro.  Last night we ran around in circles until Noah's cheeks were flushed and he almost passed out before we finished the third song.  He rocks hard.

Evan's doing well.  He follows us around the room with his eyes and keeps looking at us like he's waiting to tell us something.  I can't help but feel like there's a little voice in there wondering what the hell we're doing in his house.  His looks around with a mixture of "this is my world" and "who the fk turned on the lights", a little authoritative and a little dazed.

Another Beginning this One for Real

Welcome Evan, 
Something about your arrival has made things feel fuller.  It's almost as if we've all been waiting for you so we could become what we really are.  A family of four.  Kind of unbelievable.  

Your mom and I went into the hospital to have her labor induced around 6:00pm on Jan 27.  It took a little while.  You didn't like the drugs that were supposed to bring you out to us.  Your heartbeat kept slowing down during contractions, and I guess that meant you were a bit uncomfortable.  So they stopped the medicine and we had to wait.  We actually fell asleep around 1:45 in the morning.  Around 2:10 your mom complained that she had a dull pain and she suddenly felt like pooping.  I went out and mentioned this to the nurses, and they scrambled, rushed into the room with two doctors... and about 10 minutes later you were here.  

Noah, you transformed before our eyes.  Your mom and I were scared to death that you would be crushed by Evan's arrival.  We thought you would be jealous. We thought you would be crushed to no longer be the center of our little universe, and we worried you would take this out on your little brother.  But you've had a brilliant strategy.  You brought yourself to the center of our new world by becoming something new, a bit protective, more sensitive, softer... you became an older brother.  

You want to be there every time Evan is being fed, every time he's in someone's arms... pretty much anytime he's awake.  You've said "my Evan! my Evan!" more times than I can count.  So we come up with little jobs for you- like bringing Evan's diaper to the trash can, or rubbing a little lotion on his feet.  You've done a fantastic job so far.  I'm proud of you and the way you've welcomed your little brother.  And I feel like I'm getting to know you all over again too.